Etymology.
Entomology.
Universal.
Uninterruptible.
A smile in queue at the Red Pig.
Rediagnosis with the neurologist.
Speech pathology.
Nurse practitioner.
Leaders joking in world news.
Medical decisions on the home front.
Tag Archives: happiness
In the event of human coursework
Well, I’ve waited a long time to reveal the latest development by our caged…cagey scientists in the bowels of the beast called our not so nutsy secret headquarters and here it is [drum egg rolls, please]…
After raiding the refuse bins of millions of wasteful homes, our scientists have assembled a supercomputer made of mobile phones and in the process have created the best simulation of a general brain of our species to date.
How is this possible, you ask?
Ahh…I love a good ounce of delayed gratification shaken with a dab of anticipation.
You see, one of our gang figured it like this. To emulate the brain, you need brain waves.
Where do you get brain waves out of mobile phone circuit boards?
Well, I’ll tell you.
It’s them radios they all got inside.
And the ability to not only hook the boards into a giant, humongous, multiple parallel processor but also to sync them using instant messaging (IM, SMS, and OOA (other obscure acronyms)) sent across individual mobile phone processors via batch processing using distinct radio frequencies.
At least that’s what they told me to tell you.
I just want to know, how do I get the thing drunk enough to buy my Next Big Thing that’s as full of hot air as the last useless one I sold the previous supercomputer that thought it was so smart but couldn’t resist the easiest sales closing script known to just about everybody in the business?
That’s all for now, folks. Gotta see if MORTIE has new information to pass you, you know, in case there’s a hot stock tip to pass your way or something like that.
Meanwhile, keep the home fires burning and the hacking hot. We’ve got a planet to run!
Image of the day
WIRED: The Bounty of Species in a Single Scoop of Seafloor Mud
from WIRED magazine.
Parody, Comedy, Satire, Tragedy
After reading “Masters of Mystery: The Strange Friendship of Arthur Conan Doyle and Harry Houdini,” I happened upon this extraordinary site:
Parody, Comedy, Satire, or Tragedy? You Decide!
Congrats to Coleen Monroe and her adventure of speaking over other ether, i.e., the radio waves.
Honestly
While the LSU and Alabama [semipro] college football teams prepare to battle for a win in Snooze Fest 2.0 (aka the BCS National Football Championship (at least it’s not named a “World” title in usual American fashion)), rumour has it that the creators/financiers of the film “Drag0nheart” have settled for 50% of all earnings, both past and future, from the estate of J.K Rowling and the creators/financiers of the Harry Potter films and associated merchandising/memorabilia for obvious ripoffs of Dragonheart’s storyline and characters.
Iran denies it has the strength of China behind it in threatening to close down Hormuz and the U.S. denies that the people onboard the ship they rescued from pirates were high-ranked members of the Iranian government seeking to escape from a country getting choked on its own oil reserves and hoping to get their hands on offshore bank accounts.
Meanwhile, the people of Bolivia have expressed strong interest in swapping places with the people of Belize and the people of New Zealand have expressed an even stronger interest in not swapping places with the people of Australia.
Miners and other of the extracting persuasion are happy to give up their operations in the bitter cold of Antarctica in exchange for developing a pipeline of extraction in the area commonly known as the country of Afghanistan.
Kurds eating their curds and whey are on their way there, too, tired of dealing with the genocidal maniacs who claim allegiance to a political entity called Turkey (which, incidentally, is full of turkey and well-stuffed with good Armenian cooks…cooked stories about Armenian natural disappearances, that is).
And no, these two news items are not related, aren’t they? [where’s a good triple-negative when you need one?]:
- Reorganisation of war management capabilities.
- Exposé on the war.
A nod to Ada Byron and the women of ENIAC, brainiacs who changed the world.
Pearly gate crashers
A group of cosmetologists and astrologers held a surprise birthday party for Dr. Stephen Hawking today.
At the end of the party, the group released an official statement:
“We predict that our esteemed colleague will need a haircut and manicure before the next full moon.”
When asked about any insight into scientific breakthroughs at the LHC or other research centres, the spokesperson for AACHU (Association of Astrologers and Cosmetologists for Human Understanding) sneezed and then said, “We have no idea what the Large Haircut Centre will design next but we’re told those born under the sign of Pisces should avoid dying their hair if swirled into a bouffant style and previously dyed pink, yellow or green. Also, avoid new relationships until the next meteor shower.”
Images of my father
As we begin the adventure with my father in his quest for detailed diagnosis/treatment of health changes, I’ll post a few personal images of him and his family, with stories inserted along the road of life this blog represents in spacetime.
Recharging
Can you do the math?
Published in today’s edition of a local newspaper — see if you can figure this out:
You CAN Change the World
Here’s to the people on the streets in Russia and everywhere around the world seeking to make positive change in their [sub]/subba/culture:
The Mighty, Mighty Young at Heart
Meanwhile, the Committee meeting this afternoon will give me the impetus to comment on the future of our global society due to influence of the likes of Kim Jong Il and Vaclav Havel and their inheritable replacements, both real and imagined.
Thanks to the folks at Colonial Heights Presbyterian Church last night for putting on a great show — very moving, deeply touching and a wonderful start to the end of this year taking us into the hope and promise of 2012.
Glad 2011 is behind us!!!
treetrunkdings 