Got your 50K planned out yet?
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More Tinkerer than Smart Thinker I am
A happy fool for God’s love?
What is artful thinking?
Today, I held in my hand all of my life’s savings in one check (well, most of it, anyway) — millions and millions (of pennies, at least).
I walked into an office building and handed the check to a woman I’ve seen maybe five times in my life for a total of 10 or 15 minutes.
She kindly made a photocopy of the check and wrote my phone number down.
I turned and walked out of the office building.
What that an act of artful thinking?
Guess it’s time to start thinking ahead now that I’m fully into the second year of the second 50 years of my life, virtually penniless.
My second childhood is in full bloom.
Waaaah! Smack me, Abi, I’m being a bad boy! 😉
Time to memorise some dance moves — my inexperienced description of them below —
lead’s point-of-view (thanks to Matt Auclair for putting them together with Abi):
- Horse-and-cart whip
- Left-side pass to stop her in basket position
- Walk behind, pass her right side, stop in front, turned to the side
- Left-side pass with right hand, inside turn, then he goes under
- Her walk around him, underarm turn
- Quarter turn to his left
- Sweetheart with his left hand, underarm turn to her right
- Right-side pass, whip with over/underarm turn
- Behind-the-back pass with double outside turn, change hands
- Right-side pass with basic salsa move, end with her turning complete circle on left foot, right leg extended, ending in split
- Overarm turn, start walking on left leg, she taking two steps and turning, he taking two steps with her and two more
- Sugar with two-hands, swaying toward/away from each other
- “Pretzel” — turn her, then him, turn her out with right hand
- Right-hand pass behind back, turn back around her left
- Left-hand pass with turn into sweetheart
- Walk forward in sweetheart hold
In military news…
For those of you who need that extra boost during your night patrols, we can supply you with large bottles of fermented liquid labeled “Wound Care.”
Should you require sterilisation, the liquid will clean an open wound.
Just don’t light a match because it’s PGA, and I’m not talking about the Professional Golf Association, either! [HICCUP!]
Also available in your grocer’s freezer.
Kickstarter Update #5
Well, it has been an interesting time here at Project Xceed Xpectations.
As you may remember, or not, when last we updated you about our ongoing effort to kickstart a Kickstarter campaign, we had high hopes of showing you the latest robot-in-a-notebook prototype sketches.
Unfortunately, an argument broke out between the Creative Arts Department and the Impractical Science Department over ideas detailed by the unprofitable Engineering Design Centre.
When you manage a bunch of independent sorts who generate their own income and have no golden handcuffs, cooperation is a funny business.
But why bore you with personnel problems?
The facts are these — we were going to show you how our paper robots were going to be powered by one of three methods: a) tether, b) coin batter(y/ies), and/or c) solar cell.
Then, our buyers down in the Manufacturing Department ran into a small problem of paying our suppliers for the power parts we needed.
Never fear! Our military veterans on staff came to the rescue. Turns out they had friends who had connections with unnamed sources in an unmentionable country who could get us an unlimited supply of nuclear-powered energy cells if we’d just give them 51% ownership of the project.
Therefore, we’re in negotiations at this point and cannot with confidence show you our engineering drawings without knowing for sure whether we need to add a radiation shield to protect your loved ones from “batteries” with a half-life longer than your estimated full lives which would be quickly shortened based on the hazmat/MSDS sheets written in Russian Chinese Izbekistanese a nonstandard international language.
Symphony Orchestra of Wails and Lamentations
Lee realised he was part of a doorframe, but where and when was he?
He was the dead wood, for some reason.
He knew he was in the wrong data structure, trapped in a blog different than the one Guin had ended up after they had been ejected from the black hole.
He recalled a conversation with his wife from centuries ago — Karen.
“It’s as if Bai wants me to be with her, exclusive of you, a test of my friendship and…”
“That’s the thing. Bai shouldn’t be testing your friendship.”
“But I want both you and her to be happy…”
“You definitely should not be the one who has to worry about her happiness.”
“She’s a friend who happens to be our dance instructor.”
“Yes but…”
“And every woman I dance with instantly becomes my friend, whom I want to be happy. Don’t you feel that way?”
“I don’t get asked to dance.”
“Sure you do. A lot of guys asked you to dance in St. Louis.”
“Not a lot…two.”
“Still, though, that’s more than before. If you just keep practicing, you’ll keep getting better and attract attention of guys who want dance partners.”
“That’s what bothers me. I have to keep defending my marriage to all your dance partners who ask me if we’re married. I tell them yes, thinking that’s enough but then they ask if I mind if they dance more often with you than I do.”
“But don’t you like to dance?”
“I used to. Because I danced with you. You were my first and you’re still the one I want to dance with. But I feel like you’re leaving me behind.”
“I want to dance with you. We just need to practice more in order for you to catch up.”
“I haven’t got my turns down yet…and I can’t spin.”
“I know. And the only way to get them is to practice. I’m willing to practice with you every day, if that’s what it takes. We started all this for you, not me.”
“And another thing that bothers me is you and Bai telling me that you can teach me at MY pace, as if I’m slow. It’s condescending.”
“It’s my fault. I told her that this is all about you and that it’s true I’ve gotten ahead of you. She’s just trying to do what’s best for you.”
“Maybe. But I really am tired of fending off your suitors.”
“You’ve got it all wrong. You know I’m a big flirt. And dancing is like the best fun of flirting there is.”
“For you, it is. Because you ask dozens of women to dance.”
“I have not. The dozens of women I’ve danced with is because of our rotating partners in workshops. I haven’t asked as many as you think.”
“Well, it sure seems like a lot are bothering me.”
“I promise it’s because a lot of us like to dance.”
“‘Dance?’ Seems like ‘dance’ is more like a substitute for dating or sex sometimes.”
“For some. But I really want you to become a better dancer. And I’ll dance with you as much as you want…”
“As long as I let you dance with other partners, is that it?”
“You’re the one who’s been encouraging me to dance with other women.”
“True. But that was before I saw all the divorced women who were interested in men like you. It feels like a meat market sometimes and I have to fight them off for a dance with MY husband.”
“I’m sorry you see it that way.”
“That’s not the way I see it. I’m stating the logical facts. You just don’t see it that way.”
“Do I not sit beside you, waiting for when you’re ready to go out on the floor for a dance?”
“Yes. But I can see how anxious you are to dance with other women. You don’t see yourself the way I do.”
Lee looked from the doorframe and at the rest of the states of energy around him.
He heard a man call out and a woman respond. He felt a low rumbling sound, as if the ground was pulsing rhythmically or a door was being rattled.
He knew where he was. It was a scene from a movie called “The Shining.” How could he be in a film?
He called out to Guin in his thoughts and surprisingly found himself in the middle of a conversation between Guin, Shadowgrass, Bai and Eoj.
What other surprises would he encounter?
Were any of them real?
Why did he suspect that he had merged into a side of the universe that no one knew existed?
Postscript side notes
In a postscript side note, it is interesting to observe fearmongers say the sky is going to fall should the government of the United States of America default.
Speculation is an interesting art, if not a science.
In today’s global economy, how important is a government, even one like the U.S.’s, to the average person who doesn’t think in terms of national identity anymore?
What if we let one government default on its loan payments?
What if we prove that a government’s debt obligation is not a necessary component, a relic of the days of the nanny state?
I look forward to the U.S. government defaulting, showing the economic celebrities like Warren Buffett and Christine Lagarde that life goes on, regardless.
People are resilient.
We change, sometimes slowly, reluctantly, complaining bitterly, and sometimes happily, embracing the temporary chaos that change causes.
We shall see, won’t we? hehehe
For the continued storylines in this blog, go to…
For the continued storylines in this blog, go to http://www.treetrunkmoss.wordpress.com.
And please, please, please, seek professional counseling before deciding to kill yourself. If nothing else, look in the mirror and tell the world the universe is here to serve you, so the world will just have to deal with your greatness.
I am the greatest person the universe has ever seen.
I know it if no one else does and that’s all that matters.
For those who don’t know, it’s their loss, not mine.
For more on the topic, read “In local news…“.
Now, back to my new blog!
Gratitude
A big “Thanks” go out to you, all my wonderful readers. You helped triple my blog hits in the last 24 hours!
BTW, I’m moving to a new blog. Sometimes the bad guys win — in this case, Collapsaricus the black hole won, defeating and destroying Lee and Guin, ending a storyline hundreds of years in the making.
Have a great life!
treetrunkdings 