“The laser’s red glare/The bombs bursting in air…”

In this post-nationalist, one-global-economy world, we still talk about the brand effects of nations.

We expect that powerful lasers will protect our ships and our borders, slicing bullets in half and cutting planes/drones/UAVs to pieces.

“Look out for the hazardous debris falling from the sky!” cried Chicken Little presciently, paraphrasing.

Speaking of borders, our crackpot scheming pseudoscientists devised a method to protect borders from tunnels — causing pinpoint earthquakes that unsettle the ground several hundred metres in any direction, shifting the soil around reinforced smuggling tunnels, hopefully collapsing them without knowing they’re there.

Are we ever in as much danger as we hear security companies try to sell us that we are?

What is the percentage chance that your home will be broken into?

Have you or anyone you know ever been robbed or mugged?

Has anything been stolen from you?

Have you stolen anything (including office material and work hours from your employer)?

As we create the next generation of our species, we take these questions into consideration.

Can we genetically encompass a moral compass?

What about a lack of fear of others?

It’s easy to create a new species of spider which has no moral compass.

Like we’ve discussed, “eat and/or be eaten” rules Earth, a moral compass unnecessary.

How much of a civil society do we need when our DNA is significantly modified to handle new offworld environments?

How does one carve a niche when one’s genetic code designates one’s predilected destiny?

How much education can we cram into our genes?

What is the ideal citizen in 2037, 25 years from now, not far from an imaginary moment in Unix history?

Adaptable, of course.

What else…?

Who is Felicia Day and why have I never heard of her before today?

They talked about…

They talked about the convergence, the “singularity,” but they didn’t see themselves existing in a time after the moment passed.

At first, we wrote tales about gods and science fiction stories about automatons, robots and imagined some perfect/dystopian future in which we interacted with artificial beings.

Then, as time collected in history books, we lost track of the changes.

Our toys became more sentient than ourselves.

Our friends turned into cyborgs without us noticing.

We augmented our reality so slowly that we missed when we no longer depended solely on our memories and person-to-person storytelling to describe our worlds, the reality around us.

In a flash, cave drawings, hieroglyphics, books, computers and ubiquitous bioelectronic network technology became part of our lives.

It was one small step forward for the solar system, transforming a single species into a management system for one planet that expanded on to other planets and eventually beyond the edges of the solar system itself.

We thought we were in control.

Little did we know the convergence, the “singularity,” happened millennia ago.

We, the current seven billion, are a tiny snapshot of the post-convergence generation.

Singularity is an antique term no longer applicable.

It is time to get ahead of ourselves and see what we’ve really become.

Look back 1000 years from now, or even just a few hundred…

…understand why so many of us appeared weak, soft, spoiled and easily hypnotised by our well-developed self-hypnosis techniques handed to us by generations of ancestors slowly coalescing via mass hypnosis.

We will talk about the present-viewed-from-the-future tomorrow.

Tonight, sleep well.  Get some rest.  Let your dreams comfort you.

Then, when most of you are fully awake, we will describe the future where we no longer have to fear ourselves or each other anymore.

G’night!

News Digest, 14th of October 2012

A few years ago, I installed a couple of ultrasonic buzzers in our attics to keep out animals.  The first year, it was quieter than usual — fewer bumps in the middle of the night by our furry friends.  Then, this year, I discovered a family of raccoons had taken up residence in the attic.

Call it affirmation of survival of the fittest except, in this case, it is a family of deaf raccoons that discovered a place to live peaceably under the roof of our house.

I found out that fact last night by opening the attic door and shouting at the raccons to be quiet.  The baby raccoons kept chasing each other until one of them must have smelled me and turned, catching the attention of the other two who turned and froze, too.

Waving my arms and making aggressive charging motions scared them off into the unreachable corners.

Well, at least there’ll be no more screaming at the top of my lungs and confirming to my neighbours that the crazy man next door is trying to commune with the dead again.

In robot news, more from the analysis of Heidegger’s Being and Time by Hubert L. Dreyfus…

“2. Comportment is adaptable and copes with the situation in a variety of ways. Carpenters do not hammer like robots.  Even in typing, which seems most reflex-like and automatic, the expert does not return to the home keys but strikes the next key from wherever the hand and fingers are at the time.  In such coping one responds on the basis of a vast past experience of what has happened in previous situations, or, more exactly, one’s comportment manifests dispositions that have been shaped by a vast amount of previous dealings, so that in most cases when we exercise these dispositions everything works the way it should.”

“4. If something goes wrong, people and higher animals are startled. Mechanisms and insects are never startled. People are startled because their activity is directed into the future even when they are not pursuing conscious goals.  Dasein is always ahead of itself.”

In other words, our actions/thoughts are based purely on the past while focused on the future.  No wonder we have no idea what we’re doing in the present moment.

In business news, UPS made a hostile bid for the company Space Exploration Technologies Corp, commonly known as SpaceX, now that SpaceX has demonstrated its near-Earth-orbit package delivery service is reliable.

Experts expect FedEx to make a competitive bid to prevent UPS from expanding its reaches to “infinity and beyond,” with FedEx merely wanting to “be there before there are customers to be there,” mainly the Earth-to-Moon route that international transportation corporations are watering at the mouth to sink their teeth into.

The UPS CEO denied that Felix Baumgartner would be vice president of dropoff service for the new SpaceX division, if their bid is accepted.

The bicycle messenger union has opened negotiations for a stratospheric drop and parachute deployment training center that could provide pinpoint hand-delivery of packages to customers in remote locations via sky-high balloon or dirigible.

Pickup of the delivery person is a major sticking point in the negotiations at this time.

While…

While we wait for the launch of the balloon/capsule combo that will take Felix Baumgartner to a 23-mile jumpoff altitude, we pause to reflect on the activities of our species elsewhere:

  • Children are born
  • Bombs are set off in street bazaars
  • Flowers bloom from planted seeds
  • Families gather for reverent reasons
  • People suffer smashups on highways
  • A person learns to read
  • Someone dies from an accidental injection of meningitis
  • A phone rings

A song for the moment.

An Apology

We want to apologise to you Earthians.

A friend of ours who used to work in the roadside gem mining tourism business in western North Carolina — where “seeding” buckets with gems is common practice — was responsible for cleaning the scoop on the Mars rover, Curiosity, before it left your planet for the planet of war.

As a practical joke, he “seeded” the scoop on the rover so that when the rover processed the Martian soil, the seeded material would give a hilarious test result for scientists to ponder.

Or so we believe he first said.

Since then, he has retracted his original statement and is seeking psychiatric help in order to avoid jail time which would have been administered by the Inner Solar System Scientific Crime Council in a summary judgement.

We are evaluating other test equipment on board the rover, wondering if the purple haze we see in some images is a result of him covering camera lenses with rubies, sapphires and other gems he collected during his youth.

The Apple computer corporation is cooperating in this investigation.

The U.S. State Department has denied providing consultation to the worker on the ability to backtrack from one’s initial statements and expect to be believed ever again.

More as it develops…

Do Nice Guys, Who Finish, Last?

The countdown shows 13,722 days to go.

I had promised myself not to care, to let my minions, given assignments in 1000-day increments, carry out their tasks, coordinate with each other and find a way to make the dream come true, with or without me.

I keep my head in the game, watching what they do, quietly making suggestions without seeming to insert myself into their conscious thought process.

I visit local establishments, saying thanks to people like Mathew at North Alabama Computer Associates, James at Radio Shack, Ricky at Chili’s, Honey at Best Buy Mobile, John Carroll at Walmart, Dominique at Beauregard’s, Caitlin at Carson’s Grille, and Mock Electronics.

What I find, when I order online, is the absence of connecting with people face-to-face.

Even so, I set up a chatbot to answer the phone for me and talk with “Rachel from Card Services” that (who?) is not related to another robocaller which (who?) says, “Do not hang up the phone!”

My chatbot switches languages word-by-word and phrase-by-phrase to test the intelligence of the chatbot on the other end of the line.

You didn’t know there was a silent chatbot war going on, did you?

You just thought you were receiving annoying calls from telephone solicitors, didn’t you?

Well, it’s like that.

See, I’m a nice guy.  I go with the flow most of the time.

However, and there’s always a however (or ‘owever (or “but…”)), years of refining the exteriour personality, being a nice, easygoing guy, letting my wife blame me for a variety of issues that are of marginal importance to me, but sufficient for me to keep track (dancing skills, yardwork, house repair, etc. — see the comic strip “Dagwood” for further examples), appearances are deceiving.

I’m not always a nice guy.  I can be, am, deceptive, downright mean, ornery, angry.

My job is to slowly replace members of our species with robots, androids, chatbots, cyborgs, etc., to maximise the efficiency of the system that will allow me to achieve the major milestone I only appear to not be reaching 13,722 days from now.

Some of my minions are self-aware enough to realise what they’re being asked to do, make themselves expendable, no sequels in their future.

The rest of you?  I don’t know.  You tell me.

I can put you to work creating new organisms that will establish beachheads on other planetoids, if you wish.

Or, to satisfy some members of the Committee, I can set the chess game of a war in motion, eliminating hundreds of millions of you, causing a setback in my timetable.

I prefer the former — it preserves the option of wars on other planets for our offspring to spring on each other.

While we’re on the subject, are you one of those who, when competing against one another, call each other schoolyard names that are unacceptable in polite company?  I watch Australians make mountains out of molehills with such a scenario and wonder what else we primates are capable of when competing for the highest social positions in the land…

Time for the next set of actions to stir the pot of the national political election season!

What if…

What if a living organism defined intelligence in a way that is not based on pattern matching?

What would it be…hmm…are not molecules a form of atomic pattern matching???

An exercise for readers until the next installment which reveals an answer that contains no matching patterns.