Before there was 9-1-1…

In the United States, a three-digit number can be dialed/called that will connect you to an emergency assistance call center.

Apparently, the young men below hadn’t yet gotten the memo that the old number, 0-5-1, is no longer in use.

However, we appreciate their enthusiasm and give them a “thumbs up” for their effort!:

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Congrats to my secondary school alma mater, the Central Cougars, for their win last night — your coach seems to have found the magic formula this year.

And finally, we ask the police department not to do any more favours for the University of Tennessee – Knoxville men’s football team, such as providing locker room material that, “just in case” our team beats a longtime rival, the police will prevent fans from entering the field of play to celebrate.  You jinx our team one more time and you better believe that we’ll accelerate the decrease in your pension plan, especially that of your leaders, “just in case” you don’t get the message the first time.  Yeah, that’s right — it’s a direct challenge!  Some of us would rather see a few broken bones and injuries amongst the diehard fans after we’ve annihilated our sports enemies than sit at home and mop up our spilled beer in defeat.

A Game of Virtual Martial Arts

In order to reduce head, and thus brain, injuries, the national referee committee for the American sport known as football ruled today that players may no longer run into each other but must engage the opponent using martial art techniques, no blows to the head or groin area allowed; otherwise, kick and punch as much as you want to move forward or stop the movement of the football.

The goal of moving the football over the baseline of the opponents’ “end zone” remains in effect.

All other rules are in the process of being reviewed, pending the outcome of the dispute over islands in the East China Sea, which the NFL was hoping to sponsor one of their playing surfaces for an expansion team in Hawaii (the Senkaku-Diaoyu Field), and a small disturbance in Egypt over the portrayal of Mohammed as a gay misogynist who hated his mother and believed the only good woman was one enslaved by marriage to a bisexual polygamist, which the NFL was going to allow as a mascot for a new team to be announced at the end of the season.

Great News for Marching Band NASCAR Fans

Ever wonder what goes on behind the scenes before you hear the performer(s) sing/play the pregame song before your favourite sports activity?

Well, here’s a bit of info for those who will watch an upcoming NASCAR-affiliated race [courtesy of a marching band parent]:

Dear Parent(s) and Students:

Late yesterday afternoon I received a phone call from the Denny Hamlin Foundation requesting the Lancer Band’s help. For those who do not know, Denny Hamlin is a Manchester graduate (Class of ’99) and currently the driver for the Fed Ex #11 Joe Gibbs Racing NASCAR Sprint Cup Team. Each year prior to the NASCAR race at Richmond International Raceway (RIR), Denny hosts a celebrity charity race to benefit the Denny Hamlin Foundation that donates money to Cystic Fibrosis and other children’s charities.

Denny has asked the Marching Lancers to perform the National Anthem at RIR prior to his race and the Late Model Stock Car race held on Thursday, April 26.

Each Marching Lancer- brass, woodwind, percussion, guard, and twirler- is invited to participate.

This is quite an honor and Denny really wants it to be a hometown-feel type of event hence him asking for his high school band.

Thank you all for your support and patience! The people at RIR, the Denny Hamlin Foundation, and NASCAR, are extremely excited about the Marching Lancers performing Thursday night. We are the only high school in the country that will perform the National Anthem at a major NASCAR race this season. We are extremely honored!

Here are some important details:

…we will travel via school bus to RIR.
We will perform the Anthem twice.
6:55PM- Perform Anthem for Late Model Stock Car Race
8:25PM- Perform Anthem for Denny Hamlin Short Track Show Down

After the second Anthem performance we will move in to the stands to watch Denny race. We are his special guests for the evening.

Students need to bring a jacket/sweatshirt. We will Not change out of our pants.

Students MUST BRING EAR PLUGS to be worn during the Anthem (to counteract sound delay of PA system) and for the race. It will be painful without hearing protection. Regular foam earplugs will work fine. Students will not be allowed to wear headphones during the Anthem but can do so during the race.

Bring the earplugs for tomorrow’s rehearsal, too, so you can get use to wearing them while we play.

Bring money for dinner at the concession stand.

Have black socks, white gloves , and marching shoes.