Irony or…what? A website saying we should reduced CO2. You figure it out. Maybe it’s tragedy, a band playing its swan song on a sinking ship?
Tag Archives: satire
Feasibility study
Leave it to the supercomputer to generate a hilarious scenario.
Based on input of recent headlines, the supercomputer predicts a day when a radicalized billionaire will deliver 3D-printed weapons to every citizen of a single district, flooding every transportation channel — air, above/below water, surface — with vehicles and people loaded with 3D-printed weapons by the hundreds of thousands as they enter the district, overwhelming the legal response of authorities to prevent the entry of these weapons disguised as toys, office supplies, spare car parts, cosmetics, personal electronics and spy equipment from Cold War films/books of the past — James Bond, Green Hornet, Batman, Iron Man, Merlin, etc., as everyday citizen, good and/or bad — simply as a demonstration of what bored billionaires will do with their wealth for entertainment, radicalization as a means of chaos creation, not religious or political conviction, because they inherited the wealth and have no need to protect it any longer, competing against each other for fun increases of social media chattering class disruption levels: whoever creates the largest number of most outrageous headlines/stories/tweets/viral videos wins.
It’s time to shut down and reprogram the main algorithms of the supercomputer which have gone off on tangents I find fascinating but not always constructive.
I want space colonies, not billions of pawns on a chess board to push over.
Speaking of fascinating, yesterday the minister read aloud another interesting passage of the Bible — Acts 16:16-40 — maybe I should read the good book more often myself:
Paul and Silas in Prison
16 One day as we were going down to the place of prayer, we met a demon-possessed slave girl. She was a fortune-teller who earned a lot of money for her masters. 17 She followed Paul and the rest of us, shouting, “These men are servants of the Most High God, and they have come to tell you how to be saved.”
18 This went on day after day until Paul got so exasperated that he turned and said to the demon within her, “I command you in the name of Jesus Christ to come out of her.” And instantly it left her.
19 Her masters’ hopes of wealth were now shattered, so they grabbed Paul and Silas and dragged them before the authorities at the marketplace. 20 “The whole city is in an uproar because of these Jews!” they shouted to the city officials. 21 “They are teaching customs that are illegal for us Romans to practice.”
22 A mob quickly formed against Paul and Silas, and the city officials ordered them stripped and beaten with wooden rods. 23 They were severely beaten, and then they were thrown into prison. The jailer was ordered to make sure they didn’t escape. 24 So the jailer put them into the inner dungeon and clamped their feet in the stocks.
25 Around midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening. 26 Suddenly, there was a massive earthquake, and the prison was shaken to its foundations. All the doors immediately flew open, and the chains of every prisoner fell off! 27 The jailer woke up to see the prison doors wide open. He assumed the prisoners had escaped, so he drew his sword to kill himself. 28 But Paul shouted to him, “Stop! Don’t kill yourself! We are all here!”
29 The jailer called for lights and ran to the dungeon and fell down trembling before Paul and Silas. 30 Then he brought them out and asked, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?”
31 They replied, “Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, along with everyone in your household.” 32 And they shared the word of the Lord with him and with all who lived in his household. 33 Even at that hour of the night, the jailer cared for them and washed their wounds. Then he and everyone in his household were immediately baptized. 34 He brought them into his house and set a meal before them, and he and his entire household rejoiced because they all believed in God.
35 The next morning the city officials sent the police to tell the jailer, “Let those men go!” 36 So the jailer told Paul, “The city officials have said you and Silas are free to leave. Go in peace.”
37 But Paul replied, “They have publicly beaten us without a trial and put us in prison—and we are Roman citizens. So now they want us to leave secretly? Certainly not! Let them come themselves to release us!”
38 When the police reported this, the city officials were alarmed to learn that Paul and Silas were Roman citizens. 39 So they came to the jail and apologized to them. Then they brought them out and begged them to leave the city. 40 When Paul and Silas left the prison, they returned to the home of Lydia. There they met with the believers and encouraged them once more. Then they left town.
Guest Post From Ashleigh Brilliant, 5/11/2013
His latest:
Dear Friends,
As many of you know, from time to time I go through my most recent pile of accumulated thoughts and ideas, and send out those that seem most worth sharing. They are not necessarily ideas for new Pot-Shots, although I realize many of them could be. Of course some are better than others, but I do claim that, as far as possible, they are all original, and not consciously copied from anyone or anywhere else.There are too many to fling at you all at once, so I will send them in batches. The first batch follows. Each item is numbered. So if you will give me the numbers of no more than 5 that you like best in this batch, I’ll tally the results and let you know the winners. If you want to share your reasons, or make comments on any of the items, of course I’ll be interested in anything you have to say.——————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————
1. A new study has found that we should have given more attention to some of the old studies. 2. I have so many secrets to be kept from so many different people, it’s getting harder to remember who mustn’t know what. 3. Don’t ask too much of yourself –you may already owe yourself more than you can repay. 4. Things don’t all get resolved in anyone’s life story –That’s why so many hope for a sequel. 5. They both wanted to die in bed,But it was a single bed,So they had to take turns dying in it. 6. I see by your ensembleThat you are a gay cowboy. 7. You have the power to change people’s lives — starting with your own. 8. First rule of dreaming:Every dream should have a theme. 9. Book title:LINGERIE FOR THE LAWLESS: THE UNDERWORLD AND ITS UNDERWEAR. 10. INCHISM: the belief in going slowly. 11. This is serious:I can’t think of any scheduled eventI don’t want to die before. 12. Question: The word “adit” (which one encounters mainly in crossword puzzles) means the entrance to a mine. But it is presumably the opposite, and from the same root, as “exit.” Why did “exit” stick around in our general usage, while “adit” practically exited altogether? 13. How I feel depends on the time of day, time of year, and time of life. 14. Better safe than sorry — but I’m sorry I have to be so concerned about being safe. 15. Who was that masked nanny? 16. I was stunned by the news that I had a concussion. 17. Permission to laugh. 18. Special thanks to God for making all this possible. 19. It takes courage to be me. 20. The announcement of my birth was intended as a joke –But nobody got the point. 21. It’s never happened yet,but at some point in the futureI hope to have a normal day. 22. To a true poet,long hair on noisy cattle becomes “flowing locks on lowing flocks.” 23. However long you wait,There is no guaranteeThat your patience will ever be rewarded. 22. Where there is no light,white is just as black as black. 23. They had their disagreements,But they did crosswords together Without one cross word. 24. Sometimes I’m glad I took my own advice. 25. Trouble doesn’t always tell me when it’s coming –It seems to enjoy making surprise visits. 26. I left no tracks, but even if I did,who would want to follow them? 27. You need take only one step towards tomorrow – it’s called today. 28. 100 things you should do before I die. 29. It took all my strengthjust to admit to myselfthat I’m exhausted. 30. Don’t ask me why I’m doing it – I’m doing it because it gives me something to do. 31. He’s still alive,but only because he hasn’t yet been ableto write a good suicide note. 32. An expert critic of drainage:A CONNESEWER. 33. Important safety information:Life is a dangerous place. 34. I can deal with the past, and even with the present, If the future would just go away. 35. Identity is an illusion –Nobody is really anybody. 36. All I want is to stay alive long enough to see good triumph over evil. 37. I’m not the only one to have these problems –There’s a big support group out there, called Humanity. 38. From now onIt will be the future. 39. All was going well, until Reality reared its ugly head. 40. Are you ready for disappointment and frustration?If not, proceed anyway – they are always ready for you. 41. Look how much has happened already –And, for all we know, the Universe has barely begun. 42. I asked God “Are you crazy?”and he said “Yes.” 43. It’s lonely here in my skull –If I make a hole in it, can you come in? 44. Some paperless currency is not worththe paper it isn’t printed on. 45. My only purpose in life may be to give a strange dog something to bark at. 46. International all-purpose protest movement:UNITED INDIGNITIES 47. I’m entitled to know the whole truth,but God seems to be holding something back. 48. TEDDY THE UNSTEADY –The bi-polar bear. 49. If you’re looking for an easy target, aim at human stupidity – It’s everywhere – you can hardly miss. 50. Life goes on until somebody dies,Then it still goes on – unless you were the somebody. 51. THIS IS NOT WHAT IT OBVIOUSLY IS. 52. If you take away enough pieces of the puzzle,you are left with nothing to puzzle you. 53. God refuses to tell me what I want to know,And there’s no one else to ask. 54. Being strong is half the battle –The other half is being well-insured. 55. The trouble is, I’ve never really been my old self.
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All the best,Ashleigh Brilliant
P.S. Thanks to those of you who have so far taken the trouble to read and comment on my 1967 diary. Your reactions have ranged from outrage (fortunately only a very few) to delight, warm nostalgia, and congratulations on my “courage.”
Waking up
So, the question I have for myself is how do we get funny money (and/or their equivalents) into the hands of everyone enough that they’re happy and they know, clap their hands?
No “taxing the rich” or “steal from the rich to feed the poor” argumental barriers in the way.
Thanks to Bill G and others in financial circles for the thought nudge.
Who says there’s never a Dull moment in Kingsport?
A Weight Loss Clinic might be more effective!
Invasion of the Colon Attachers!
The map?
Links for the day
BONUS TRACK
I’m taking the next few days off for a meditation retreat. Talk to you next week.
BTW, here’s the list of books I promised you last week — see if you can figure out what they are:
Random image of the day — my wife when I first met her at summer camp:
My wife more recently, the glassblower:
Up next: my grandfather’s map!
Real women wear lab coats
Thanks to Lynn and hygienists at the office of Dr. Pugh, D.M.D.; Cindy, Dori, and Dr. Kostrzewa, M.D. (general otolaryngology) at North Alabama ENT Associates; Anita Giles, M.S., CCC-A, at Physicians Hearing Center.
My teeth and gums get a full bill of health.
HOWEVER, MY HEARING NEEDS ASSISTANCE!
On this new adventure, with the (re)discovery of a “cookie bite” inherited hearing loss (see chart below for example) and, after age 50, almost deaf in some frequencies (moderate hearing loss 50-60 dB in 500-4000 Hz range), I am investigating the possibility of amplifying the sounds around me with hearing aids.
I am familiar with tinnitus from personal experience, which tells me my brain is probably interpreting lack of audio input as random noise.
I am familiar with the brands Beltone, Miracle Ear, and Siemens from experience in my family with hearing aids.
Now, I get to choose not only the level of technology I want but also the exteriour colour choice.
I familiarize myself with new brands such as Phonak and Oticon.
I read material online from “neutral” sources such as Consumer Reports and Hearing Loss Association.
Now that I’m a member, I peruse the AARP website for advice on hearing aids.
All while the spectre of the medical procedure called colonoscopy raises its snakelike camera head over me.
Happiness is hearing a pin drop.
I don’t think colonoscopies cure situational depression/anxiety. What about hearing aids?











