I ask myself…

…as I look forward to a week of personal technology-based project developments and dance practice, I ask myself, “If my happiness is dependent on my financial relationships with other people, what happens when my financial well runs dry?”

Translation: how many friends have I bought with money?  I can’t think of a single person who has called me up just to get together for pure fun.  Am I deluding myself into missing those who HAVE tried to contact me?  Yes, now that I think about it, there are a few friends, maybe one or two, who have called me once in the past year to get together for lunch.

I asked for the life of a hermit who has assertiveness problems in the presence of other people, afraid to ask people for help because I’ll then feel obligated to help them in their time of need when I’m not that helpful of a person, and I got it!

Guess that’s why I see nursing homes and assisted living facilities as fraudulent places to steal your money, huh?

Looking at my personality traits in the funhouse mirror is enlightening, downright depressing today…all because I didn’t have the nerve to ask a stranger to dance last night!

Time to stop beating myself up and, if I can, motivate my wife to eat lunch with me so we can practice dancing this afternoon.


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