Thanks to Abby, Hannah and cooks!
Tag Archives: satire
Prosecutorial accusatorial propositions
According to inside sources, the chief prosecutor’s office says they will raise the possibility that radical Islam is in fact a cover for homosexuality and incest, with the Boston bombing suspects being a case of mother-to-son and brother-to-brother love trysts of the most heinous immoral acts in our species, resulting in God’s punishment for them and their victims for allowing such thoughts, let alone behaviour, to be tolerated and cultivated in modern civilisation, confirming the current administration’s contention that promoting sin as a means of flushing out, prosecuting and incarcerating weak sinners is the best way of strengthening the country and proving that old Bible saying, “The wages of sin is death,” purifying the culture just in time for the next election cycle, taking away the opposition’s core tenets (and tent poles), hoping that enough oldtimers and hardliners will vote the other way to solidify the one-party system once and for all.
The sources did not know how education and immigration reform fit into the overall political juggling/jigsaw puzzle.
Unraveled thread
Instructions from my grandfather included a coded message about the following image, which, if I have figured the code out, refers to the unknown animal in the background as something related to the strange light in New Hampshire. Is that a fist or an alien blob floating on the right????
More as it develops as I try to interpret the 3D map!
Saying of the day
Whiners are gonna wine.
Winos are gonna whine.
Winners rarely whine are known to wine on occasion.
Whine, wine or win — best two out of three, wino not included with purchase.
Yesterday’s Today is Tomorrow
For a brief moment, I was a kid again.
Yesterday, in preparation for watching a film at the cinema about a cartoon character known as Iron Man, I scrolled through websites detailing a few storylines that encompass worlds and universes in one comic book series or another.
Although I was never geeky enough to keep track of comic drawing styles, character bios or inside jokes, I knew enough about the fantasy lives of fellow classmates who did that I could briefly carry on a conversation with those who read not only comic books and watched Saturday morning cartoons but who also consumed novelisations and books containing specifications of spaceships, weaponry and superhero powers.
A few of them transitioned to board games like Dungeons & Dragons — I detailed those people in a previous novel or blog entry and won’t repeat myself here — because fantasy and science fiction computer games didn’t exist, unless you can stretch your imagination and say that Pong was a game between gods sending universes back and forth across matter/antimatter timelines.
For the most part, our schoolyard games were either cowboy-and-Indian or space cowboy-vs-evil alien shoot ’em ups and chases.
2001: A Space Odyssey was released when we were too young to care and Star Wars arrived in our high school years when most of us already had well-established hobbies to occupy our thoughts. Star Trek was an after-school show that, along with Batman and Wild Wild West, captured the attention of the average nerd in our early teens.
Now that I’m a middle-aged white guy who’s more likely to die of suicide than a car wreck, I can either further regress into a childhood I never really had or I can progress into an elderly adult I haven’t yet been, avoiding the mental illness pitfalls that lead to premature death.
To end today’s blog entry, I’ll provide an untraceable source of a quote by a semi-famous author:
“My dear,
Find what you love and let it kill you. Let it drain from you your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness. Let it kill you, and let it devour your remains.For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover.
Falsely yours,
Henry Charles Bukowski”
Show: Me, the Money
Life seen from the point of view of the masses, which are obsessed with CEO pay.
Life seen from the point of view of the masses, which are obsessed with how real life works.
If you don’t know that money makes the world go around, get out of the math and sciences (and, rich gods forbid, the liberal arts) and get a real job.
Buttlescut
Rumour has it that Indians have called for a worldwide boycott of Chinesemade goods until the Chinese military removes itself from Indian territory.
Otherwise, consequence will put Confucius in forgotten memory.
In sporting news…
Earlier today the SEC and ESPN announced an agreement that exploitation of college athletes is their bread and butter for at least the next 20 years, pushing the importance of academics in the SE United States further back into the 20th century.
When…
When the U.S. political party known as the GOP recently moved to the far-right on the political spectrum, it moved the Democratic Party to the moderate right right where the GOP wanted the U.S. government to be, did it not?
After all, I see little in the way of protests about the latest appointments to the Obama presidential Cabinet, which means that the so-called left has no grounds for complaining and neither does the so-called right.
Stalemate.
Now, back to my reading the original issues of the exciting comic book series, T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents!
Trying to understand why goldfish muck around a fountain…
My friends in the American sport known affectionately as the NFL have argued with me that just because they like wearing tight pants, gloves and fancy, shiny, bejeweled hats does not, in fact, imply that they are anything more than normal heterosexual men, neither gay nor bisexual, and certainly not cross-dressers or transsexuals.
Well, who am I to counter-argue?
After all, my fat-to-muscle ratio is entirely out of proportion to theirs and my 40-yard dash is more like a 40-yard wheezing shuffle.
Don’t get me wrong. I like a good argument.
Let’s look at some examples of what a good football game could look like if we decided not to take the players at their word.
Like this one, a nice, muddy reenactment of the Battle of Pearl Harbour.
Now, compare it to its “opposite”, a muddy NFL game — is there really any difference?
I mean, if women are willing to play football in their skivvies, what are guys all wrapped up in pads trying prove?
Let’s take another look: helmet-to-helmet hit vs. the Battle of Hastings vs. NFL players at their toughest vs. other guys in outfits dancing.
I don’t know…is there that much difference? Seems like the first video was the toughest of the bunch.
Of course, what takes place in the locker room afterward may seal the deal but it’s not my business who likes taking group showers.
I won’t bother you with comparing ballet performances to NBA games — you’ve surely already seen those comparisons….or NHL games to Disney on Ice…or…Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson in a tutu???
treetrunkdings 