Pardon me while I dig a sprout from between my teeth. Sehr gut!
On condition of anonymity, after receiving a hefty bribe, a U.S. government official allegedly told me that the words “France” and anything French have been banned from the official AmED [American English Dictionary]. Further, the U.S. government has retracted its claim to have freed France the country near Spain from Germany during WWII and has ceded the country near Spain to Germany in exchange for Germany extending an unlimited use of the words “twitter” and “facebook” to German language speakers/writers.
Congrats to the Danes, who proved that the Viking spirit is still alive in the name of Tycho Brahe.
I’m a little behind on my big behind in thanking people who’ve interacted with me in business or purely social situations lately, including Dr. Tom, Cheryl, Sandy, Imaria, Kristine, Ray, Kisha, Billie, Dawn, Leonard, Johnnie, Marlin, Jason, Lativia and several who are working on nursing or business management college coursework.
Congrats to Chestney for being the first person on her mother’s side of the family to get her high school diploma – we’re proud of you, young lady.
Welcome to the new era of CV gaps – I miss the old days when employers such as myself readily accepted excuses for employment gaps like: “The period of unemployment from 1969 to 1991 on my resumé? I was following the Grateful Dead.” We had more varied workplaces which enhanced creativity rather than goosestepping employees afraid to take time off for miniretirements.
C’est la vista.
A little bird told me that a rocket team has already secretly launched a small vehicle toward the Moon which will deposit the first Earth-to-Moon food delivery package, possibly containing fresh bread and muffins from David and Cheryl Walker of Atlanta Bread Company. The first humans to retrieve the package will find a winning lottery ticket. Or something like that.
Time to apply a little elbow grease and get back to work.
= = =
I leave you with this spot of humour:
A redneck with a bucket full of live fish was approached recently by a game warden in Central Mississippi as he started to drive his boat away from a lake.
The game warden asked the man, “May I see your fishing license please?”
“Naw, sir,” replied the redneck. “I don’t need none of them there papers. These here are my pet fish.”
“Pet fish??”
“Yep. Once a week, I bring these here fish o’mine down to the lake and let ’em swim ’round for a while. Then when I whistle, they swim right back into my net and I take ’em home.”
“What a line of bull….you’re under arrest.”
The redneck said, “It’s the truth, Mr. Gov’ment Man. I’ll show ya! We do this all the time!!”
“WE do, now, do WE?” smirked the warden. “PROVE it!”
The redneck released the fish into the lake and stood and waited.
After a few minutes, the warden said, “Well?”
“Well, WHUT?” said the redneck.
The warden asked, “When are you going to call them back?”
“Call who back?”
“The FISH,” replied the warden!
“Whut fish?” asked the redneck.
MORAL OF THE STORY:
We may not be as smart as some city slickers, but we ain’t as dumb as some government employees. You can say what you want about the South, but we never hear of anyone retiring and moving north.