Through the years, my wife and I have observed married couples get a divorce.

The reasons for the divorce vary but there seems to be one subcategory worth noting: the dependent wife whose husband left her for someone else.

We should never generalise or else we ASSUME (and some of you know what that means).

However, when several data points create a trend, then the trend is worth noting for analysis and critique.

For example, there are some divorced women who may not have had much of a soft heart for the suffering of others while they were married but afterward…?

Let’s stir the pot and see what we get.

What is it about a man’s crotch that leads him away from the comfortable confines of a marriage to a loyal wife and into the arms of another woman?

The reader can, through experience or questioning, find the answer to that question.

We see that the result frequently ends in an unamicable divorce, leaving a bitter attitude in the thoughts of the ex-wife.

From that bitterness, many changes occur.

One of them is the “woe is me, I miss my days of depending on a husband’s salary to support myself and my lifestyle (with or without kids),” which becomes a larger idea that if divorce agreements are unfair, we can make up for it by saving all the forgotten pets, children and other lost causes.

[I did say I was stirring the pot here, didn’t I?  Maybe poking a hornet’s nest would be more appropriate.]

From that viewpoint, it leads to “On whom or what can I reliably depend when my ex-husband and his/my family won’t?  The government, of course!”

But that’s just one viewpoint.

Others turn to rely more on themselves and their ingenuity to break away from a dependency mindset.

Some get revenge.

Some never look back, realising what caused the mistake that led to divorce, lesson learned, and grow into better people.

Some marriages were never meant to be.

Some don’t outlive their usefulness as a safe nest to incubate and raise the little chickadees until they leave the nest.

How many of us are [co]dependents, finding a mate we lean upon for our life sustenance, forever looking for means to feed our [co]dependence after divorce?

None of us is perfect.  We do what we can with what we have to be whomever we wish.

Is [co]dependency innate or learned?  In either case, how do we nurture an independent mindset that takes us away from believing that the Big Brother/Mother/Father of government has all the answers?

Do we have to?

In other words, what makes us believe in the public pooling of resources and public decisionmaking about the reprioritisation of resource allocation?

Who is responsible for taking care of widows and orphans?  Or mentally-deranged military veterans?

Must the alphas and the strong care about the meek and the weak?

What divides forms of profit into social good and criminal intent?

What forces a person to work for another with little longterm benefit?

How does a government explain its policy of taking a small portion of a person’s earnings to provide the worker lifetime public services when the earnings are not a livable wage over the lifespan of the worker, meaning neither the government nor the worker can survive if the majority of workers have the same level of unlivable earnings and the government has no other income and/or cannot reallocate income to cover the expense of caring for the workers?

When does a government, like a marriage, outlive its usefulness?  What happens to the [co]dependents afterward?