
A Work In Progress
Did You?
I sit with others who’ve paid to sit here;
You sit here to learn e-commerce.
We all walk away with changes to ourselves
But are your changes like mine?
Society tells me you naturally think differently,
My natural instincts tell me we think alike,
That we all want to live.
How does e-commerce help me want to live?
How does e-commerce help you want to live?
Maybe we will never know but that doesn’t stop me from wondering.
I wonder…
…where you get your red hair
…what puts a smile on your face
…what you think of me (if indeed, you think of me at all)
I’ll always wonder and never know but that is the joy and mystery of who you are,
A human like me
Full of lost opportunities, present uncertainties, and future possibilities.
The smile on your face puts a smile in my heart
And if I get nothing more from e-commerce class
Than the memory of your smile, the profile of your face
And the reflection of your hair,
Then I’ve gotten more than the university class I attended.
— 14 Sept 2000
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Had I known that you would be this way
Had I known that you would be this way,
Perhaps this day would be different,
But then every day is different
So how can I ever know that your behavior
Would have any effect on this day?
Had I known that you would be this way,
I would have planned for changes to this day,
I would have changed the contents of my arsenal,
I would have fought you with a different plan.
Had I known that you would be this way,
I would have known that I had a psychic gift,
I would have placed bets at the horse track,
I would have spent my cash on IPOs.
Had I known that you would be this way,
I would have called your friends and told them why,
I would have advertised your views to appear in tomorrow’s paper,
I would have made the world better prepared.
Had I known that you would be this way,
You would have known I would be this way,
You would have seen how I’d react,
You would have changed the way you’d be.
Had you changed the way you’d be,
I wouldn’t be here to be this way,
We wouldn’t have the chance to read these words,
We wouldn’t have memories like these to laugh at.
— 22 Sept 2000
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Where Can I Go?
Where can I go…
Do I want to go anywhere other than Huntsville?
Short, answerless thoughts…
Influenced by a traveling professor named Marvin Camfield
Who self-published a book of poetry
Full of cocktail napkin poems.
Enough said.
— 9 January 2001
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Classmates
We met…
We met
in the number-crunching class called Business Statistics.
We met
because you sat next to me.
We met
because we’re both pursuing degrees in Administrative Science.
You have chosen Accounting.
I have chosen MIS.
I cannot predict the future but
I bet we could be friends.
I will not guess what you want from life.
I…imagine children factor into the picture.
I will give you these words during test time.
— 7 June 1998
Struggling
I saw that you were having difficulty
and I gave you a start for the first problem.
Then I spent time taking notes and chatting with
the girl next to me.
I am sorry that you did not get your work done.
I could have been more attentive.
– 10 June 1998
The Big Picture
How old are you? I do not know.
The girl beside me just turned 19.
Her mother is 39 (and her grandfather 60).
By comparison, I am 36.
What are years? I do not know.
I have seen 36 of them and still cannot determine what they mean.
Meanwhile, experiences pile up at my feet.
I pick them up and see patterns,
Patterns that tell me I have lived half my life (on average (or is that the mean?)),
So I feel comfortable telling you what you may expect as you grow older.
Surely you’ve enjoyed the thrills of dating
And you have a pretty good idea of the kind of guy you like.
The question, from what I can tell, is
Do you want to marry the kind of guy you like,
The guy who likes you,
Or the guy who likes what you like?
Think about it
And realize people get most of their happiness from the partner they choose.
I wish I could sort through the population
And help you find the one element that fits into the subset
Of which you are the only other member.
Instead, I can only smile and nod at you
When you walk into class,
Talk about current problems and impending tests,
And then head out the door at the end of class.
I am not God and cannot see the future
But what I’ve seen of your personality
Tells me your future is
Kind,
Nice,
Considerate,
Helpful,
Warm,
And cheerful,
Much like you.
I hope you find a partner
Who’ll appreciate you for what you are,
Not expect you to be something else,
Listen to you,
Share with you,
Laugh and cry with you.
You deserve no less.
– 12 June 1998
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A journal for your thoughts…
My sister gave me a cloth-bound journal at Christmas
And I have spent the first weeks as owner of this journal
Going to school and managing a group of people
(Two fulltime technicians, 1 fulltime test engineer and three contract employees)
So I have not spent a lot of time doing (indeed, if one can “do”)
“Idle” thinking.
This weekend, Janeil and I have enjoyed the company
Of Anne, Nicholas and Maggie in Chattanooga.
Last night, we saw an IMAX movie about Egypt
And then ate at a restaurant called, “Cheeburger, Cheeburger” —
Presumably named after a saying from a skit on the TV show, “Saturday Night Live.”
After dinner, we came back to the hotel suite
Where Nicholas, Maggie and I played volleyball with the birthday balloons
(That we had blown up and spread around the room,
Along with other decorations,
For Anne’s early birthday
When she arrived here at the Residence Inn yesterday afternoon)
While Anne and Janeil drove to Wal-Mart
To buy bathing suits for Nicholas and Maggie.
Right now, they are swimming and Janeil is showering,
Leaving me to place the rollaway bed upright
And push the pullout bed back into the sofa
And take a few minutes to write in this journal.
I showed Nicholas and Maggie how to rub the balloons on their heads
And stick the balloons to a wall or door with static electricity.
Nicholas has enjoyed the NASCAR Lego car we gave him for Valentine’s Day
While Maggie has played with the heart stamp.
Obviously, Nicholas wants to build the paper Egyptian balance scale he got yesterday
And Maggie loves the soft, stuffed sea lion she also got at the museum gift shop.
Anne had fun opening her birthday basket with all its purple-themed items —
Lipstick (lip gloss?), fingernail polish, furry pen, feather snap bracelet,
earrings, necklace, coffee cup, hummingbird yard art and some other small items.
I have two more pieces of art drawn by Maggie to add to the collection at home.
We’ll spend most of today visiting the Chattanooga Aquarium
And then driving to our respective homes.
Adventures come in all shapes and sizes —
Some measured in time,
Some measured in stitches,
Some measured in memories.
I learn from my mistakes,
What did I learn from this adventure?
– 25 February 2001
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