Real women wear lab coats.

Thanks to Lynn and hygienists at the office of Dr. Pugh, D.M.D.; Cindy, Dori, and Dr. Kostrzewa, M.D. (general otolaryngology) at North Alabama ENT Associates; Anita Giles, M.S., CCC-A, at Physicians Hearing Center.

My teeth and gums get a full bill of health.

HOWEVER, MY HEARING NEEDS ASSISTANCE!

On this new adventure, with the (re)discovery of a “cookie bite” inherited hearing loss (see chart below for example) and, after age 50, almost deaf in some frequencies (moderate hearing loss 50-60 dB in 500-4000 Hz range), I am investigating the possibility of amplifying the sounds around me with hearing aids.

I am familiar with tinnitus from personal experience, which tells me my brain is probably interpreting lack of audio input as random noise.

I am familiar with the brands Beltone, Miracle Ear, and Siemens from experience in my family with hearing aids.

Now, I get to choose not only the level of technology I want but also the exteriour colour choice.

I familiarize myself with new brands such as Phonak and Oticon.

I read material online from “neutral” sources such as Consumer Reports and Hearing Loss Association.

Now that I’m a member, I peruse the AARP website for advice on hearing aids.

All while the spectre of the medical procedure called colonoscopy raises its snakelike camera head over me.

Happiness is hearing a pin drop.

I don’t think colonoscopies cure situational depression/anxiety. What about hearing aids?