The provisional Ruralite government in exile announced today that, in order to overcome the weak ineffectiveness of the Urbanski government in power, which is reluctant to enforce laws on the books that would strengthen its world standing, all Ruralities are authorised to match the brutality of Mexican drug cartels, using the following methods and logic, as necessary, to get their point across that theirs is the government of your future:

1. Headless bodies of lawbreakers may be dumped on the side of the road.
2. Illegal immigrants and other heathens/pagans are lawbreakers.
3. Atheists are brainwashed zombies and considered lawbreakers, per recent disclosure by the Doonesbury comic strip creator: http://assets.amuniversal.com/92c335402c5a01300755001dd8b71c47
4. Any person or persons professing nonRuralite beliefs is/are lawbreakers(s(s(es)]}).
5. Lawmakers are lawbreakers by definition.
6. These rules break the law and may be dumped by the side of the road or nailed to signposts/trees as examples to others.
7. Murderers are God’s way of turning the innocent into saints and are equally revered by angels in the afterlife — their lawbreaking incarceration/ostracising treatment has been declared unlawful and those who have not welcomed murderers, no matter any combo of government assassins, anarchists, psychopaths and/or drunk/distracted drivers, into their subcultures are lawbreakers.
8. Restaurants that serve meals which are too big to be consumed healthily by patrons on a 2-to-3 meal or 5 minimeal per-day regular caloric diet plan are lawbreakers unless they designate on menus or placards that portion sizes are allocated on the assumption that leftovers/doggie bags are mandatory.
9. The number nine is a lawbreaker and banned from further use.
10. Without the number nine, ten becomes nine and is also banned.
11. All numbers after eight, eliminated one-by-one as a substitute for the number nine, have been banned as lawbreakers.
8(d). Manufacturer’s suggested retail price is a sign of heavenly profitseeking here on Earth and lawful.